Pieces
by DementedOutcast
Summary: When a mission goes completely wrong and Jane is in the hospital, Kurt Weller is falling out control and hits his breaking point. A line had to be drawn somewhere whether that had to be between them or the case.


All that Kurt Weller could hear was the deep pounding in his chest, like his heart was going to burst right through as the fear flashed right through his eyes when he saw Jane's body collapse on the ground, the clank of the gun smacking the floor. He swiftly turned on the back of his heel, whipping out his gun and rapidly fired his entire round into the enemy then quickly rushed to her, desperately yelling out her name. Kurt dropped to his knees, removing his weapon and tossed it aside, hands immediately covering her wound as the blood seeped through the cracks of his fingers. He lowered his head to hers and whispered that everything was going to be okay, that she was going to be okay. If he was being honest with himself he didn't think anything was going to be okay.

Her eyes were slowly starting to shut.

"JANE! STAY WITH ME!" Weller frantically shouted as he lightly jerked her body, trying to keep her awake.

He couldn't lose her.

Not for a third time.

"REED, ZAPATA! CALL THE MEDICAL TEAM! NOW" Weller demanded in a frightening tone, the deep rumble of his voice echoing in the in the emptiness. Reed and Zapata nodded their heads for a response.

Jane's eyes finally shut.

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Kurt had his hands placed at the corner of the sink, fingers tightly clenched as he stared at his pale reflection in front. His blue eyes were drained from their normal steel walls; now rimmed with red with the tears pricking through then looked down to see that his hands were still covered in her blood. _Shit_. He thought. He turned the knob and grabbed the closest thing next to him, a towel and rubbed his hands against it for a few seconds, painting it red. He tossed it in the bin and took one more look at his horrific features. He shook his head side to side, wanting to clear his mind from the possible death he could have experienced today. He enter to erase his mind from everything. Kurt Weller just looked like he went through world war three.

He looked down, tired of looking at his pitiful reflection and then violently slammed his fist into the mirror, hearing the glass crack and split down the middle. He felt the searing pain, the slow draw of his blood oozing out and he was pretty sure he had a few shards stuck in his knuckles. He carefully removed his hand from the mirror slightly groaning from the ache and then turned the knob again as he splashed a handful of water on his face, letting it linger for a moment as he slowly ran his hands down his face. He didn't like the uneasy feeling settling in the pit of his stomach or the way his chest constricted around his heart when he saw Jane step in the line of fire. He let out a breath he didn't know he was holding in and splashed around round of water on his face then dropped a steel mask into place and walked out the door.

"You okay?" Reed asked when he saw Weller walk toward them. His hands were in his pockets so he didn't get questioned about his bruised knuckles.

"I've had better days." He gruffly answered, staring at the wall, the clock, and the floor, anything so they didn't have to see the crack in his shield. Kurt Weller didn't trust his emotions.

"She's been through hell and back. A bullet isn't going to stop her." Zapata warily said placing a comforting hand on his shoulder, a genuine smile edging at the corner of her lips.

 _Cricket. . ._

 _Cricket. . ._

 _Cricket. . ._

"Mayfair is going to want a full report. . ." Reed carefully started to say. Kurt finally looked to him.

"You two go. I'll be fine." He curtly said. Reed have him a skeptical look. Kurt just nodded. "If I need anything I'll call."

Reed didn't say anything else and walked out with Zapata by his side as Weller just watched them step out of the hospital. He leaned his head against the back of the chair, arms crossed at his chest and closed his eyes as his fatigue finally caught up with him. Anything that ever happened to Jane, Kurt wanted it to happen to him because he never wants to her hurt again. He already blamed himself for her disappearance and he couldn't afford to lose her again — that just wasn't possible. Kurt felt a sense of guilt wash over him since he's the one who's supposed to be lying in that hospital bed, not the one person who he finally reconciled with. He felt everything stop in his whole body, holding in all of the wrecked and confused emotions and all the rough and light things in between.

 _If I had her back this shit wouldn't happen_. He thought. He couldn't stop playing the scene in his head. He couldn't stop seeing her body fall, he couldn't stop thinking about if she was severely wounded and he definitely couldn't stop thinking about her. Lately, Kurt's been on edge, thinking maybe he's making the wrong choices for Jane. He shot his eyes shot open as as another wave of guilt flooded him and rose to his feet; he couldn't deal with sitting around any longer knowing Jane might not make it out, but he had to keep thinking she was going to be okay. Kurt frantically started to pace back and forth in the waiting area getting a fee odd looks from the other people and just ignored them.

 _God damn it_.

"Kurt Weller?" A man in a white coat appeared, clipboard in his hand as he called out to the agent. Weller stepped forward, introducing himself. "Your partner is stable. However, she's lost a lot of blood, but she'll be all right. She just needs some rest."

Weller sighed in relief feeling a weight lift off his shoulders. "When will she be released?"

"A few hours. I'd see to it that she stays away from the field for a couple of weeks. She needs to let we body catch up with her." You're welcome to see her."

Weller didn't say anything else, following the doctor in the halls of the hospital hearing the sound of the attendant's phone ringing, the footsteps echoing and he found it a bit soothing. It drowned out all of his worries. Kurt was just glad Jane was okay and he intended to keep it that way. There was always more to her than he could explain and she was a mystery he couldn't solve and the corner of his lips twitched upward. The doctor pointed to a closed door saying this was her room until she got released.

Weller thanked him then watched him walk away then turned his head to the window staring at her peaceful frame, seeing the bandage wrapped around her shoulder as a patch of red had already bled through, her pale skin shinning from the small lights above. Weller was glued to the floor, unable to move since he was the reason why she was lying on that bed, but the other part of him just wanted to take her in his arms and apologize. _Fuck_. He thought. He was so mesmerized by her. Kurt still felt that guilt. He couldn't find anything to push that feeling away and stacked another burden on his shoulders, feeling nothing more than being dragged down in chains.

Another doctor appeared, telling him the same thing, that he was able to see her. He didn't respond, only giving the doctor a sad smile which was enough for both of them and then he finally walked in taking a long look at her. Sometimes he wished he could have gone back in time to erase this part as a memory, but life had a funny way of fucking them over. He grabbed a chair, pulling it over to the edge of her bed and glanced at her once more before he took his seat and sank his body into the cushion as a tired sigh escaped him and placed his head in his hands feeling the fatigue again.

He wanted to desperately see her viridian eyes.

Weller ran his hands through his hair, letting every ounce of irritation and worry placate his face. There was no pretending, no more hiding from from what he thought and felt, and what he knew and felt was something entirely different from his normal emotions. He lifted his head, resting his chin underneath his palm as he watched her body slowly rise and fall, the edges of his mouth barely ascent. In this moment, he wished she could always be safe, away from the cruel world. Their jobs spoke otherwise. Jane was still at his side.

"Just because I'm lying here doesn't mean I'm asleep." Jane said, turning her eyes to him and was faced with a sly grin.

"How you feeling?" Weller rose to his feet taking a seat at the edge of the bed and looked her directly in the eyes.

"Besides feeling like I got run over by a train, I feel like shit." Jane muttered under her breath. Kurt lightly chuckled.

"I'm sorry. I should have had your back." He genuinely whispered, feeling the low rumble of his voice vibrate through her. She raised her brow in question.

"You don't have to apologize, Kurt." Se softly said as she fixed her posture and leaned her back against the pillow. He warmly smiled at her. "Thank you."

Silence.

"What happened to your hand?" She suddenly asked, warily staring at him. He stared down at the floor. She sighed. "Stop beating yourself up, Kurt. I made a choice. It wasn't your fault."

Kurt Weller still had the same smile plastered to his face, continued to stare at her in the eyes and wanted to say something in return, but he found himself watching her features. He just wanted her to be safe and back at his side every time so he could make sure nothing would happen to her. They knew she was perfectly capable of taking care of herself. Jane, for a moment thought she saw a flicker of uncertainty flash in his eyes, but it went too fast for her to notice when he blinked, so she ignored the sign and focused on them.

Jane saw the pain bleeding through and wished for nothing more than for it to pass because she knew she was the cause of it and that's the last thing she wanted and whatever else he wasn't telling her. She was a bit glad that whatever he kept hidden from her would be too much for her handle, especially with the way she was now. She didn't know how far her mind would take her if she gave him permission to speak his mind. She wouldn't take her chances on that. Jane wanted that painful expression to disappear from his face so she could see his true smile he only let her see. It seemed to loosen her up.

"Kurt, whatever it is you're feeling it can't be that bad from what I've gone through." She dryly said. He rolled his eyes and saw the smile she got to see for a quick second.

"After everything that's happened to you in these past few hours you always find a way to make it seem likes it's okay." Weller warily said as his hand reached for hers, his thumb softly running circles.

"I think it's because you found a way for me to be okay." Jane said in all honesty.

"I can't lose you again." He huskily said. He could feel his hot breath against her cheek as a sudden shiver ran down her back, making the hair on the back of her neck stand.

"Kurt. . ." She wish worried uncertainly.

There was a moment of silence before they said anything else. He rose to his feet, placing a gentle kiss on her forehead and told her he'd be back in a few hours, but when he was about to walk away, Jane tightened her grip on his hand and jerked him back. His back was to her for a second then slowly turned around.

"Kurt. . ." She said once more in a low tone.

They stared into each other's eyes for a long minute seeing all the emotions unfold between them before Weller quickly walked back over to her, placed his hand behind her head and slammed their mouths together in a passionate kiss. His free hand held onto the edge of the bed, keeping his balance in place, but he wanted to feel her, leave a lingering touch on her skin and instead pulled her burning body forward as the kiss depend and heard a pleasurable moan leaving Jane's mouth. He smiled. She wrapped her good arm around his neck, pulling him down further, her fingers playing with his hair as half his body hovered over hers. He rested his forehead on hers, smiles falling on both their faces as they listened to their uneven breathing.

"Stay." Jane breathlessly said as she looked directly in his blue eyes. He nodded. Weller pulled her closer, letting her head rest on his chest while she listened to his rapidly beating heart and fell in motion with it until her fatigue caught up with her.

"Goodnight, Jane." He whispered and slowly shut his eyes.

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 **A/N: this was the first time I wrote a one shot so I'm not really sure how to take it because I'm used to writing multiple chapters. I've been meaning to write about this pairing for a while now (have you seen the way he looks at her! The attraction is there!) so hopefully this sounded good.**

 **This one shot doesn't particularly fall in with any of the episodes. I just wrote it on spur of the moment.**

 **Mistakes are all mine.**

 **Hope you guys like this. Stayed up till 1am for this!**


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